Something
Personnel
29-01-13
.02.33 am.
This
story is almost six years old .when you wants to write something very personnel
on blog it is really scary. What will readers think about me? How will they
judge my worth just by reading personnel life? At 56 if I am unable to sort out
my messy life it means as an individual I have not grown up .my inability to
find answer for my personnel life makes me an immature person for my readers.
Where is
the relational thinking in my personnel life? Why I am still unable to conclude
my personnel life logically? I know there is a serious flaw in my thinking.
I am the
one who wrote ‘we’ Indian parents scarify anything for the future of our
children that include our unhappy married life. In my real life I am running
away from parental irresponsibility. Why?
It was
not me who walked out of my home; it was my wife who ran away with my only
little daughter. when I was running the house my wife found fault with me
because I could not make '' extra money. Now she is bringing up our
daughter. She will now realize how difficult it is to run the family
with single income. When she was with me, instead of finding fault me had she
taken Hindi tuition class for children or stitched cloths for ladies and
children together we could have saved our small family. Now she would be doing
same thing in her native home for survival.
I had
never promised anyone in this world but when I make decision over my tears
there is no looking back. My wife would have brain washed my little daughter
“It is your papa who had abandoned you….”.Let it be like that. Besides I do not
have a secured job. My wife and daughter will think it is all because of their
fate! As per Indian law a father cannot take custody of his own daughter. It is
better my wife teach my daughter about love, compassion and family values.
It would be impossible for me to recover my daughter’s confidence in me.
I was a sale cum service technician later I went to write fictions but so far I
had not made money out of writing.
"it
takes inner strength and courage to persist in the face of adversity.
if you can hold on to your dreams long enough , you can make them come
true" Roopalen. I am sure more people died without achieving their
goal.
“From the
time we were born to till our last breath whether we evolve or not our perception
about world constantly changes”. Jivan.
There is
an unknown fear, fear of dying like an orphan. ‘Tomorrow ‘is another day;
tonight let me sleep peacefully.
Restless
soul,
Jivan.
29-01-13
.02.33 am.
N.B: I
wanted to write about two incidents. one of our army man was beheaded
by Pakistan army for Rs 5,00,000/- financed by Let.
Tamil film 'Vishawaroopam" was banned in Tamil Nadu citing law and order problems just because few fundamentalists found their community was portrayed in bad light. After the approval of censor board how can religious fundamentalists acts like 'extra' judicial power?
When my
own problems are greater than this universe I hardly feel like writing about
anything.
